Shovel or Pain

It’s very often said that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. And while this threadbare cliché is hardly correct, it does have some merit in the reminder that beating one’s head against a wall might very well lead to brain damage, which could be sadly mistaken for insanity.

Continue reading

A Drama-Free Zone

Or Putting the Fun Back into Dysfunctional

A wise man once told me that every family, since the biblical beginning of the human race, has some dysfunction; even Eve had an impulse control issue and just had to take a bite of that apple. We can, however, choose to put some fun back into our own version of dysfunction. For a myriad of reasons, navigating the holiday season can be like tiptoeing through a minefield littered with emotional explosive devices.

Continue reading

Death as Lesson

Last week, it was Robin Williams, who was strangled by the relentlessness of depression. And now, we have courageous journalists slaughtered by savages. Last month, it was Paula, and this week, Mark, both friends in their fifties whose hearts betrayed them swiftly and decisively. The list goes on and on, of lives extinguished prematurely.

Continue reading

Do you remember…?

You can’t control the wind, but you can adjust your sails.

Sailing up the New England coast and into Maine, I am reminded of the old adage “If you want to know what the weather is like, just wait a minute.” It’s true that the weather in the sea can change in a moment’s notice; one’s senses become attuned to the scent of shifting winds.

Continue reading


We celebrated my mother’s 93rd birthday today. I am overwhelmed with gratitude that she remains healthy, active and clear of mind, especially in light of how I see others aging.  I believe old age is simply a distillation of a life lived.  My mother has always been a kind and loving person, generous and forgiving.  Her deep faith guided her through life’s challenges…my sister’s tragic brain injury, torturous 30 year decline and death, and the loss of my father 10 years ago.

Continue reading

Cooling Off

Today was a particularly muggy day and  I chuckled when I saw the text of my clever feline friend, Pip, cooling himself on an ice pack, while sailing down the Delaware Bay.   I was reminded of this.  I was coaching one of my Super Stars a while back (all clients are super stars…they hire a coach in order to connect with their Super Stardom!) around a breakup with his Love Interest.   They were perfect together, he said…similar interests, great sex! All was right with the world.  That is, until Love Interest decided to give her ex “one last chance” to be the person that she thought he could be in her life.  She hadn’t wanted to waste the x number of years she had invested in the relationship with ex.  Super Star was devastated. ..he was convinced that no one could make Love Interest as happy as he himself could.

Continue reading